An old lady gets pulled over for speeding.
Older Woman: 'Is there a problem, Officer? '
Traffic Cop: 'Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.'
Older Woman: 'Oh, I see.'
Traffic Cop: 'Can I see your license please?'
Older Woman:
'Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.'
Traffic Cop: 'Don't have one?'
Older Woman:
'No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.'
Traffic Cop: 'I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.'
Older Woman:
'I can't do that.
Traffic Cop: Why not?'
Older Woman:
'I stole this car.
Traffic Cop: 'Stole it?'
Older Woman:
'Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.'
Traffic Cop: 'You what..?'
Older Woman
: 'His body parts are in plastic bags inside the trunk, if you want to see'
The traffic
cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back
up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car.
A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer
2: 'Ma'am, would you mind stepping out of your vehicle please..!'
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman:'Is there a problem sir?'
Officer 2: 'My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered
the owner.'
Older Woman:
'Murdered the owner? Are you serious...?'
Officer 2: Yes I'm serious ~ could you please open the trunk of your car, please!'
The woman
opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer
2: 'Is this your car, ma'am?'
Older Woman: 'Yes, here are the registration' papers.
The traffic cop is quite stunned.
Officer
2: 'My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.'
The woman
digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license quizzically.
Officer
2: 'Thank you ma'am, but I am rather puzzled, as I was told by my officer here
that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered
and hacked up the owner...?'
Older Woman:
'I bet the lying b#st#rd told you I was speeding, too..?'
Don't Mess With Mature Ladies